a fall in energy

it was such an innocent beginning. to look upon another's adventures and mission manifested in such beauty and with such conviction makes one reflect on the lack of both in oneself. 

perhaps that's what happened tonight. i think i've just suffered from a lack of conviction in what i'm doing. i'm conflicted.

where does my heart lie? part of it pulls towards the margins of the world where a new life and a new love awaits. i can feel it. but part of it anchors me home. it anchors me here. 

it started so innocently. and now mind, heart and soul are in such conflict. lesson learned. i cannot let my mind wander to the adventures of others while the practicality of life does not allow for me to wander with them.